Differences

My husband and I had times in our marriage that were not so great. Probably like most couples, we had our ups and downs, but there were times when it seemed we kept going down further and further. Unfortunately there was a lot of divorce in his family and at those times when our relationship was rocky, it seemed the “D” word dropped easily from his lips and fell like a heavy weight between us. I didn’t like it.

The main reason I didn’t like it was because I had made a vow not only to my husband, but more importantly, to God that I would love and cherish my husband until “death us do part”. I did not want to offend God by taking the “easy” way out. I took my vow seriously, plus there was no domestic violence, it was just two people jockeying for control and quite honestly, most of it was rather petty stuff from what I can remember. We had different ways of doing things, saying things, interacting with others, etc. Probably the very things that attracted us to each other (opposites attract) became the little problems that plagued us. A lack of communication, our own selfishness, plus a failure to try to understand each other’s perspective lead to the down times and dropping of the hurtful word, divorce.

In an updated edition of Thomas A Kempis’ The Imitation of Christ, Kempis reminds us that “We should not count ourselves better than others, for perhaps we may appear worse in the sight of God who knows what is in our souls. Do not be proud of good works, because God does not judge as people do. What pleases people often displeases him…It does us no harm to place ourselves below all others, but great harm occurs when we place ourselves above even one person. Peace is always with the humble person, but in the heart of the proud there is envy and continual wrath.”

I thank God that Mike and I continued to seek Him, sought help from Biblical counselors, and by seeking to please God rather than ourselves, we were able to put aside our petty differences and embrace what made us unique and drew us together in the first place.

2 Corinthians 4:18

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen,

but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary,

but what is unseen is eternal.

Walk

Ephesians 5:8-10 (ESV)

"For at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord.

Walk as children of light

(for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true),

and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord."

Walk. The word denotes motion, activity, moving from one place to another. I am fascinated by the number of times it is used in the book of Ephesians. (English Standard Version) Some translations use the word "live". Also an action verb. 

How are you living or walking?

"Walk as children of light." We have a choice. We can either follow the course of this world or we can follow the path that God has prepared for us to walk. As children of God's grace, mercy, and promise, our walk should be one of light. Moving ever closer to the source of light and acting more and more like Jesus and following His teachings in the Bible. Our walk should be characterized by what is good, right, true, and pleasing to Him. We should not be afraid to have our actions or words illuminated by His light and we should not be sitting still.

We all pick a path either purposefully or inadvertently. There are only two paths on which to walk. Actually, to not make a choice is to make a choice for the course of this world or to walk in darkness. Ephesians chapter 2 clearly points out that by nature we were "children of wrath" and "sons of disobedience". We once lived for ourselves and the passions of our flesh. 

Once we accept God's gift of grace through His Son, Jesus, we come into the light and discover a new path. A path illuminated by Jesus who is our light. We learn to walk a new way. God's way. It is a narrow path and not always smooth, but He promises to be with us and guide us. 

Ephesians 5:15

"Look carefully then how you walk,

not as unwise but as wise."